Pity Party

I had myself a little pity party yesterday. I don't know what it was? The weather, PMS, or just that I am crazy but between the nasty comment the "friend" made and another innocent, yet related to nasty comment, jab from my Dad I spent my afternoon yesterday crying.

It could also have been the weight gain, which I have been pissed off at myself about. Or maybe it was the dinner that I burnt to a crisp. Could have been the tater tots and hot dogs that I wound up feeding us for dinner. All in all I was very glad to see the clock strike midnight last night.

My Dear Nathan has been working like crazy with all this cold weather. Even right now as I type this, at midnight, he is getting ready to go and thaw frozen pipes for someone. In the last 3 days he has seen our girls for about 20 minutes. It sucks. I just have to keep reminding myself that when he gets his pay cheque I will be able to do the fist pump and say "cha-ching!".

I kept Darian and Camryn home from school on Monday and Tuesday. It wasn't so much the weather as it was the road conditions. I drive them to and from school and if I had been stuck anywhere I think that I would have had to give Ryleigh a crash course in the fine art of steering and tried to push us out. It wouldn't have been pretty. Especially if Ryleigh was a better driver than I. I don't need another thing to have a complex about.

Today has been a much better day. The weather was nice (only -25 instead of -40! Woo Hoo!), I got back on plan for eating, I didn't burn dinner and I even went out for a walk tonight. My parents both were great today and made me feel good. My Mom told me the same thing as everyone else has about the "friend" but it always seems to be better when your Mom tells you. I have high hopes for another good day tomorrow. Maybe I will just stay up all night so as not to give anything bad the opportunity to spoil my good mood.

This Weather Sucks!

It is insanely freaking cold today. Like the world is my deep freeze kind of cold. In anticipation of this lovely winter weather we are having I went grocery shopping on the weekend when it was not so.....cold. Did I mention it is cold here?

I picked up the usual things and casually glanced down the cat food aisle. I thought to myself that Camryn had not mentioned that we needed cat food so I would not bother to buy any. I never know how much cat food we have because it is kept in the basement which I try to avoid because if I am down there it means I am doing laundry and well....that is just not very much fun.

This morning, my dear Nathan came upstairs after telling the kids to stay in bed because they were not going to school today. He informed me that the cats (I have 3...I know....I am dumb) had no food and that even though it is too cold for me to drive the kids to school, I would have to, at some point in the day, put on my big girl panties and go outside. To the grocery store. For nothing but cat food. Uggg.

Knowing that I had to go out anyway I decided that I would attend the morning Weight Watchers meeting. I have been going in the evening but hell, at this temperature I am only going out once. I bundled up in my warmest, and coincidentally ugliest, clothing and headed off to the Weight Watchers meeting. Uggg again. I should have stayed home.

Last week I was down 5.4 lbs. I was so happy with myself, I kicked ass, took names and even drank some beer on the weekend before weigh-in. Thinking that since I had gotten away with it last week, I could continue to drink beer on the weekend, and eat lasagna (but damn was it good!!!), and potstickers, and drink Strongbow and then drink more beer. I was wrong! I put on 2.something pounds.

I don't think that I was wearing 2.something pounds worth of warm, ugly clothes and I am fairly certain that I did not eat 2.something pounds worth of breakfast. I am blaming the beer, not the lasagna because it was too yummy to be mad at. The worst part is that I know this weekend will be another bad one as it is Superbowl weekend and I can't watch the Superbowl without drinking some sort of beer. I will just have to plan for it I guess. I will use all my points on beer and not eat that day. Sounds like a great plan!

I suppose that I could say that the extra poundage was my insulating layer due to the cold weather. Yeah, I think that I will go with that...makes me feel better.

High School Sucks!

This weekend was a semi-kid-free weekend. On Saturday my parents took our munchkins with them while they went to visit my grandparents. It was perfect! We made plans to go and have dinner and drinks with our friends. Dinner was great! Drinks were great!

The shitty part of the evening came near the end when our friend could not take any longer hiding a secret. He told us that some of our other "friends" had said some very nasty things about us. At the time I didn't let it bother me as I didn't want it to ruin a great night. Yesterday I had nothing to do but think about what this person had said about us.....it made my blood boil.

It is always a slap in the face when you find out what sorts of things people are saying behind your backs, especially when they are totally untrue and uncalled for. This is not the first time that these "friends" have pissed me off (see my Been There, Done That! rant...same person). I have decided that this comment is the straw that broke the camel's back though. I have had enough. I don't need "friends" that say rude things about me to other people, that think they are better than me and that, honestly, I have next to nothing in common with.

I would love nothing more than to call this person up or confront her face to face. To call her out and tell her that she cannot continue to treat her "friends" this way and expect to still have their friendship at the end of the day. I would love to tear a strip off of her and knock her ass back down to earth were us lowly people live.....but I can't. I can't because it would cause much grief for the person who told us what she said in the first place. I don't want that to happen.

From now on I will be perpetually busy when invited to do anything with them. I will no longer take shit from someone who has put themselves up on a mile high pedestal. Fuck them! I just want to know when my life reverted back to high school cuz I hated it the first time around and it appears as though it hasn't changed!

Random Stuff

First of all, things are good in the world of work. We are officially on the go list for our trip to Florida!! Yay!! Happy, happy!! Meeting this morning went well. They have now implemented a seniority policy in regards to vacation but we are grandfathered in....good stuff. Let the count down begin!!!

This past Tuesday I went to my first Weight Watchers weigh in meeting (well it was my second but first after being on the program). I lost 5.4 lbs this week....even with all the bad beer drinking that I did over the weekend. I have managed to eat breakfast every morning, which for me, is a huge deal! I am motivated and I want to stay that way. I don't want to have to hope and pray that the seatbelt on the airplane will fit around my huge ass.

Last friday, Darian had her first ever basketball game. She is part of the Junior team at her school. The girls that they played against had obviously played as a team on previous occasions and you could tell that our girls were a tad bit intimidated but by the end of the game they had found some confidence and even managed to make a basket. Congrats to Darian and her team. I was a proud Mamma that day. I watched my daughter become part of a team, try her hardest and most important, have fun! I can't wait for their next home game!

Camryn is spending the day today skiing. She was very excited this morning as I dropped her off for school. I am sure that it is all about spending a day on the slopes but it certainly doesn't hurt that she will not have any homework tonight. At lunchtime she will be able to enjoy a nice warm hot chocolate because today Mommy didn't forget to give her some spending money. Another reason for her to rejoice!

This week both my older daughters surprised me as they are excited for Nathan and I to go on our trip. They know that they are not coming with us but that does not get in the way of them seeing that we need some time to be Nathan and Nancy and not just Mommy and Daddy. It is not all total selflessness though, they are already compiling a list of things that we are to bring back for them.

Ryleigh. She is 18 months old and refuses to talk. She knows that we can all figure out what she needs through different grunts and noises. She is also a very good pointer. I figure that I should enjoy that she has yet to talk back and just go with the flow. She will talk when she needs money as there is never any of that just laying around for her to point and grunt at.

Today things are good. Things are calm, although somewhat disorganized. I think that I will go and work on that while I have a little quiet time. Besides my parents are coming this weekend, I have to make it look like I do something other than surf the net all day.

Fallout

Further to the post I made yesterday....

I called Nathan today all excited as I have received our airline tickets in the mail today. He advised me that Big Boss Man has called a meeting for tomorrow morning before work starts. Think "going on vacation because work was kind enough to give Nathan the time off" thoughts for us tomorrow..... :(

Spoiled Brat

This May we will celebrate our 10th anniversary. We have never really done anything for our anniversary. On our first we did rent a room at the Fantasyland hotel, but it was only for one night and we were only 5 minutes away from home. Not really a momentous trip.

This year, being that it is our 10th, I want to go away. I want a real anniversary trip. Did I mention that I also did not get a honeymoon? It sucked. I have decided that we are going to go back to Florida. I want to go to Disney without the kids (I know, I know....I am a horrible Mother), I want to have my husband all to myself for more than the 5 minutes we get on any given day (sleeping together does not count) and I want to because I want to dammit!!!

I have already booked our trip. We will be gone for 5 glorious days. Nathan wanted me to wait to make sure that he could get the time off of work but I said that with there being 4 months notice that it should be OK. Well, turns out I may have been wrong. There are only 6 guys in total at the company that Nathan works at. One of them will be in school in May, which means that he cannot work. The other one, I found out, takes an annual bike ride on the weekend that we are going. Big Boss Man is going on a vacation at that same time as well. All in all, it means that there will only be 2 guys to cover work for 3 days if Nathan is not there.

Right now I am feeling kind of bad about it. I know that we should have asked first but I also know my husband....he wouldn't fight for the time off even though he says that he wants to go as bad as I do. He would just roll over and accept defeat. This is why I deal with any kind of confrontation. I don't want to have to put off my vacation, my one and only 10th anniversary that I am going to get.

I feel like a big spoiled brat....I want what I want, when I want it. And dammit, I am going to get it. The trip is booked and I am not going to cancel. They can hire my kids to work for them while we are gone since they are not coming. Sheesh, not only am I a spoiled brat but a horrible parent too. This day sucks.

Odd Americans

Yesterday afternoon, Darian, Ryleigh and I made a trip to Costco. It was an uneventful trip but one that got me thinking. While we were there I had to use to the restroom due to the copious amounts of water that weight loss requires. When I walked into the nice, clean bathroom stall I noticed that there was a toilet seat cover dispenser and it actually had covers in it. Toilet seat covers are not something that I usually give much thought to. I have come across very few public restrooms that have the dispensers bolted to the back wall and even fewer that provide the actual cover.

On our recent trip to Florida I noticed that the United States abounds with toilet seat covers. I first observed this in the Denver International Airport. There they were, staring me in the face, toilet seat covers aplenty. I didn't think much of it as we were in a busy airport, where millions of asses from all over the world converge. I kind of just chocked it up to an airport thing. When we arrived in Orlando there were more toilet seat covers. Again, thoughts went to it being an airport thing.

Throughout our 2 week vacation I noticed that not one public restroom that I visited was without toilet seat covers, all being of the paper variety. Americans are very concerned with the state of cleanliness of their asses, they don't want someone else's ass germs and god forbid, their precious asses touch the plastic that may have been exposed to the general public's asses.

On our way home, I thought about all the numerous times that I chuckled to myself about ass hygiene. Canadians are not as worried about it as evidenced by a distinct lack of toilet seat covers. Then I entered the restroom in Chicago O'Hare International. The newly dubbed mecca of toilet seat covers. In the O'Hare restrooms they have mechanical toilet seat covers, not made of paper but of plastic. You don't even have to work for a new cover, all you have to do is wave your hand in front of the magic box and a fresh, clean, sanitary cover appears for you out of the computerized toilet seat cover dispenser attached to the toilet. It was a little odd sitting on a plastic covered toilet seat. I felt like I was in some sort of grandparent-induced nightmare, where all the furniture is covered in plastic, including the toilet.

Another thing that I noticed is that Americans do not feel the need to remove their footwear at the entrance of a home. Our vacation home had the nastiest carpets that I have ever seen! I have been in many a carpeted restaurant here whose carpets looked clean enough to eat off of, even in the midst of the slushiest winters day. This fact astounds me. Why is it more important to have a clean ass than it is to have clean feet. Maybe Americans should take off their pants and skooch around on their clean asses so as not to have to put their dirty feet on the carpet. The other option could be disposable booties. Or there is always the ever popular Canadian idea....take your damn shoes off at the door!

All in all, my trip was a glorious one. I came home with sore, dirty feet but my ass was sparkling clean. I am sure had someone looked, they might even have been able to see their reflection in it.

It's Time

So my Mom called me today to let me know that my brother finally activated our Disney Photopass. She gave me the information needed to go online and look at the pictures we had taken by a Disney photographer. FUCK ME!!!!! I can't believe how awful I look. :( I am standing amongst 8 other people and I am the only one that you see all thanks to the extra 100 or so pounds that I am carrying around, and I can't even blame it on a baby....

So now it is time. I really need to do something about this as I am utterly disgusted with the sight of myself. I know that this is going to be really hard as I am positive that the main culprit of my weight gain is beer. Yes, that is right, the Nectar of the Gods, my favorite beverage in the whole entire world....beer. Nathan and I have been saying that we need to cut down on drinking, especially now as I want to go back to Disney. I have another reason to cut back and that is so that my ass can fit into a plane seat because if I keep going the way I am, it won't!

Another thing that I need to remedy are my eating habits. I am not a breakfast person, or a lunch person. I like to eat at night, which has to change. I already know the importance of eating in the morning so today I actually had breakfast and it was healthy. This morning I also joined Weight Watchers on-line. I am not going to commit myself to meetings just yet. If I find that I am not being as accountable to the internet as I should be then I will start attending traditional meetings.

I have also contemplated joining Spa Lady for some time now but I am hesitant as I am very much the kind of person who needs someone to drag me to a gym. If I could find someone else that was attending on a regular basis and could be my buddy then I might just join. I have been wanting to go swimming with the kids but right now the closest pool to us is closed for another week. I will look at when public swimming is and would like to enroll myself and Ryleigh in a Parent-Tot class if one is available.

These are my grand plans for the time being. I always start out all gung-ho with weight loss and quickly settle back into my old and fattening ways. As a way to try not to let that happen this time I am going to start blogging about my journey with the hopes that it will help keep me on the right path. This sucks. I can't believe that I have done this to myself. I want to be able to look at myself and know that I worked hard to get the body I have not that I have hardly worked and wound up with more body than I want.

To my 2 readers....please ride my large ass if you do not see that I am holding up to at the very least the blogging part of this mission. I need all the help that I can get. :(

Just a Quickie....

It is January. It is cold. It is still winter and there are still at least 3 more months of it. It sucks. It especially sucks when only a week ago I was enjoying +30 weather in Sunny Florida. I want to go back....here are some reasons why.....

- it was +30 in December
- the Molson Canadian was only $6.00 a six-pack
- the Wal-Mart sold Molson Canadian
- the Wal-Mart was open 24 hours a day
- you can buy beer 24 hours a day
- there is beer at the 7-11
- the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day
- groceries are cheap
- Disney World is there
- it was warm
- there are pools in the back yards
- there were no mosquitoes (if there are mosquitoes during the summer I bet they aren't so big that they could carry your children off like they are here)
- it was sunny
- the humidity felt good
- there is football there....real football, not the CFL
- you can drink beer in the parking lot at the football game
- there is no labour shortage
- there is no snow
- Floridians say "y'all"
- they think our money is "cute"
- you can buy a cell phone for $20.00