Monday, June 11, 2007

Use Your Indoor Voice

I hate the bank. I especially hate the Royal Bank. Today was an occasion that made me loathe that I have money and that it is not underneath my mattress. It was not the bank's fault today though.

I walk through the doors, groaning as usual. I hate this bank for the fact that there are always a million people in line and only 2 tellers. One who goes to smoke between each client like they had just had the best sex ever and the trainee who can't shit without the manager being in on it. Anyway, surprise of all surprises, today they had 5 tellers, the line was actually moving faster than a snail.

I was just standing there, waiting patiently when this annoying, shrill, high-pitched, Minnie Mouse, WAY TOO LOUD FOR A BANK VOICE draws my attention to the business wicket. Minnie Mouse looks like all the other people that go to the business wicket. Perky, blond, skinny, in heels high enough to look down her nose at everyone of us poor suckers in the normal, million person long, line.

She told the poor teller all about how the parking spaces around her building are being developed and how they went from "like 20 spaces to like 3 spaces which totally sucks because I don't want to have to walk like 4 blocks to my building in heels. And there are, like, creepy people who ask you for like money and like cigarettes and stuff". She further went on to explain about how "like Whyte Ave. was like awesome this weekend. Do you like hang out there? I went to...." drone, drone, like drone.

Thank god that the trainee and the smoker were not working today because I am sure that if I had to stand in that line-up any longer I would have like put my like foot up her like ass!!!! Either that or I am sure that she would have moved on to a much more interested topic...say like yeast infections or stuff.

If the poor teller didn't hang out on Whyte Ave before she might just start because clients like Minnie Mouse would surely drive me to drink.


Cammy said...


Cammy said...

Have I told you lately that you rock?